Hi, my name is D----, and I'm in group because I am a partner of a sex addict and sexual anorexic, and I am healing from co-sex addiction, codependency, low self-esteem, and overeating.

I feel stable in my recovery today.

This week for recovery work I started working on Step 6. It is nowhere near being finished and it could be a while. It's about our "defects of character." I feel like having my husband and my kids do this one for me. They'll probably be able to list off my defects with lightning speed and accuracy.

Acting out behaviors this week. The control thing again with my kids. I can't remember exactly what I did, but I remember thinking afterwards, "Acting out!" And here is a hard one to admit... remember that awesome Praise Report I sent out? Yeah, well, I suck, okay? The day I got the "all clear" from the polygrapher, there was just a little blip on the report. I can't remember exactly how he phrased it, but he said something like this: "On the question, 'Since January, 2007, have you had any sexual relations without your wife?' the second result showed a slight reactivity that was not present on the first or third results. It remains this examiner's opinion that Mr. B was being truthful. The slight reactivity could have been due to Mr. B concentrating too hard on the question." So, even though the guy said he was being truthful, I still asked him, "Why was there any reactivity?" A trained professional says he's tellling the truth and I'm still looking for more proof....

Acting in behaviors. Again, some fantasy (not s*x, just fantasizing about things I might have done or said in the past that could have changed where I am today). I'm back to wearing my rubberband for this. It is pretty helpful.

This week I felt like I was getting closer to becoming a human being, being more honest about myself and who I am. Did I ever feel like this as a child...maybe after I went to Confession at church. Maybe...

My five commandments this week are in "okay" shape. I missed morning prayer twice and evening prayer twice.

My spiritual self care this week has been continuing to listen to that book called "What's So Amazing About Grace" by Philip Yancey. It's been really helpful with all of the angst surrounding Step 5.

My self care this week was seriously lacking. Everyone has a cold over here and the house feels like a giant petri dish. My self care has boiled down to using Purell after I throw out snotty tissues. Does that count? I'm thinking not.

What I like about myself today is that I'm really working on my relationship with God and my prayers feel more genuine.